Friday, October 30, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Remembering love
Nowadays, my siblings and I share a slogan: "Sana hindi na lang nagpakasal si Mommy at Daddy." Sana, sana. Their relationship has become so unbelievably disastrous that we would honestly and sincerely choose non-existence over life in this kind of circumstance.
I look at my father and mother and I see two people so filled with hatred for each other. It would be easy to just part ways and move on with their own separate lives, only they have us to deal with. Nowadays, having been born to these two irreconcilable people has become a grave sin. We are their proverbial ball and chain, and they will not let us forget it.
To imagine them as two people who once saw love in each other has become impossible.
This makes me think. Would Ice's and my future children share this sentiment? Our differences, after all, are undeniably striking. I fear that we would end up exactly like my parents. Oh please not.
I cannot imagine that the time will come when I no longer care for him, when I cannot even see in him the man I once loved. I wonder if when that time comes, I will have forgotten about the poems he wrote for me, the warm hugs, and his little surprises just because. How sad will it be if I forget.
And so, tonight, let me talk about love. Let me talk about the things I want to remember when things take a turn for the worse.
I look at my father and mother and I see two people so filled with hatred for each other. It would be easy to just part ways and move on with their own separate lives, only they have us to deal with. Nowadays, having been born to these two irreconcilable people has become a grave sin. We are their proverbial ball and chain, and they will not let us forget it.
To imagine them as two people who once saw love in each other has become impossible.
This makes me think. Would Ice's and my future children share this sentiment? Our differences, after all, are undeniably striking. I fear that we would end up exactly like my parents. Oh please not.
I cannot imagine that the time will come when I no longer care for him, when I cannot even see in him the man I once loved. I wonder if when that time comes, I will have forgotten about the poems he wrote for me, the warm hugs, and his little surprises just because. How sad will it be if I forget.
And so, tonight, let me talk about love. Let me talk about the things I want to remember when things take a turn for the worse.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Tomorrow we fight, but we do not know why.
I wonder if this is how soldiers feel the night before a battle.
My siblings and I, we keep reminding ourselves of our goal. In the middle of all the planning, we would find ourselves stopping and going back to the very beginning. Perhaps it is because we do not really know what we're fighting for. Or perhaps, it is because we do not want to fight even given our reasons. All we know is that we have to fight. And fight, we will.
Maybe tomorrow, in the middle of the battlefield, the reason will strike us like an epiphany. When it does, I hope, with all my heart, that it is worth all the blood shed.
My siblings and I, we keep reminding ourselves of our goal. In the middle of all the planning, we would find ourselves stopping and going back to the very beginning. Perhaps it is because we do not really know what we're fighting for. Or perhaps, it is because we do not want to fight even given our reasons. All we know is that we have to fight. And fight, we will.
Maybe tomorrow, in the middle of the battlefield, the reason will strike us like an epiphany. When it does, I hope, with all my heart, that it is worth all the blood shed.
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